I had my second VA appointment for Cognitive Processing Therapy (CPT) therapy (current phase of my PTSD therapy)( at the Lakewood VA Hospital. As with the first CPT session last week, I was edgy this morning before I left for the appointment. It’s an interesting approach as is an active therapy where you have to recognize the triggers and record your reactions based on known “stuck” points (e.g., a list of examples that you go select “Stuck Points” categories [Safety, Trust, Power/Control, Esteem, and Intimacy]}. It’s a 12 week course and the councelor I’m working with told me it’s a very powerful, helpful process and many vets have benefited by it. My first trigger I chose to write about was on Authority and I didn’t realize how deeply embedded my distrust for authority is. So, CPT is working thus far.
I will also tell you there was a time I would have never publicly acknowledged that I was undergoing PTSD treatment, let alone talk about the details. I entered PTSD treatment to improve my life and my interaction with my family. It has helped immensely and I’m truly glad I made this decision.
As with my first session I felt drained when I left the building into a brisk sunny morning with brilliant blue skies. There are a number of large rocks arranged in a garden along with a number of maple trees in front of the VA building where I go. This morning as I walked towards the entrance, one of the rocks had a huge pile of maple leaves raked around the rock. I took a photo or two but the sun hadn’t really hit the rock yet so they were non-keepers.
When I walked out I went back to the rock and walked around in the leaves for a while looking for the best view. It was a wonderful sensation when Iheard the rustling of the leaves as well as feeling the leaves scattering around as I walked. I actually wished the leaves had been gathered in a huge pile – if they had done so, I would have jumped in just like I did when I was a teenager in Albuquerque when we raked a million or so leaves from the trees in the yard.
I finally found my spot and walked away with a beautiful shot of the rock and leaves basking in the sun’s rays.
I hope you enjoy it as much as I do.
Fleeting Moment (Nikon Df, 55mm macro-Nikkor, ISO 200, 1/400 sec @ f11).
As I stood there after my last shot, I looked up and saw this amazing scene of the sun shining through the fall maple leaves. I couldn’t resist and here is the image titled “Shadows and Patterns”.
Shadows and Patterns (Nikon Df, 55 mm macro-Nikkor, ISO 200, 1/1600 @ 5.6)